The Pussyhat: Knitting a Grass Roots Political Action Movement

Washington DC, January 21, 2017 Did you notice all the pink "pussyhats" in the photos of the Womens Marches this past weekend? They were hard to miss. The Pussyhat Project inspired thousands of women.  Me included. I dusted off my rusty knitting skills that had been dormant for at least 20 years and I made two pussyhats, one for me and one for my friend Karen.  My knitting inspired my daughters. Rya made pussy hats for four friends.  And Carla made one for her 7 year … [Read more...]

Question Your Assumptions – They Can Be Very, Very Wrong

It's easy to make assumptions about people. I do it all the time and you probably do too. We All Make Assumptions Assumptions help you make short-hand sense of the world.  You expect people in a certain place to look and dress a certain way.  And when that's not the way they look, you make assumptions that are sometimes just flat out wrong. If you've been reading this blog for a while, you know that my husband and I are friends with Clemetin Allen. Clemetin's life has … [Read more...]

May the New Year Bring You FLOW: Embrace Your Anxiety!

I woke up this morning full of dread. Or, more precisely, I was full of anxiety, which feels a bit like dread. The New Year has begun. The vacation days are over and the list of things to be done feels mountainous. Anxiety Stems from the Unknown Some of the items on that list are simple and I know how to do them. Some of them are big and complicated and I’m not sure how to do them or if they will succeed. Those are the projects that make me anxious. You probably … [Read more...]

The Perfect Holiday Gift to End the Year

This week, I’ve gotten flowers and candy and peanuts from people who want to thank me for something I’ve done for them. These gifts are fine. I do appreciate them.  And I’m happy to be on people’s gift lists. But honestly, I’d rather they just called or left a message or texted me. I try not to eat candy or peanuts. I actively dislike most of the cheap, yellow cheeses and pepperoni that arrive in fancy gift baskets. I’m offended by the huge amount of packaging that … [Read more...]

Lean in Softly

Have you ever listened to someone in order to gather evidence that what he or she is saying is wrong? Have you ever felt yourself lying in wait until the person phrases something in a way that you can grab and throw back, killing what might have been a fragile thought trying to become better formed? That kind of listening is geared to winning rather than connecting. People often use words and ideas to build walls of confrontation.  We harden our hearts and build walls … [Read more...]

Use the Cycle of Creation to Get Things Done

Months ago, on the glass wall behind my desk chair, I wrote the following words: Hope Disillusionment Pragmatism Renewal I'm sure I pulled those words from somewhere. They probably represent somebody's well-known cycle. But for the life of me, I can't remember where I first saw them. So while I'm not the person who coined this series of words, I'd like to borrow them and present them to you as the cycle of creation. Let's compare that to another well … [Read more...]

The Anti-Trump Armband Project Takes Shape

I couldn't shake it from my mind.  And I can't let it go. I'm in mourning for the ideals I hold dear -- the ideals of my 70+ year lifetime. I've gotten lots of thoughts and suggestions from friends and acquaintances.  And I've gotten help.   Help thinking through and designing an image. Help in figuring out the message.  Help in finding a url that'll make sense. The First Prototypes My friend created a preliminary logo in record time.  I've ordered iron-on decals … [Read more...]

Would You Take a Stand for Your Values?

Since the 2016 election, I've been vacillating between wanting to put my head down and disappear and wanting to stand up and be seen as someone who believes in inclusiveness and social justice and honesty, kindness and love. One moment, I bury myself deep in a page-turner type novel, hiding from the world. And The next minute, I think about things I might do to raise up the values I so believe in through the years to come. An Idea is Taking Shape.. I, like many people, … [Read more...]

If / When-Then: A Tactic to Help You Follow Through

I've just about finished reading Robert Cialdini's new book, Pre-Suasion: A Revolutionary Way to Influence and Persuade. While it's interesting and occasionally fascinating, I've gotten one big tip that is making a big difference in my life and you may find helpful, too. He calls it If/When-Then.  And I've been trying it out with promising results. Connect Your Desired Behavior to Trigger Events The idea is to tie goals you have to triggering events that lead to … [Read more...]

My Silent Decry of “Idiot” Chased Her Away From the Table

In the heat of the political season, I'm finding it difficult to talk with people who don't share my views. Even as I try to frame a comment or question in a non-judgmental way, my brain quietly inserts "You idiot" at the end of each sentence. For example, I found myself sitting across the table from a woman who supported Trump. We were both staying at the same Inn in Denver and six or seven of the guests were having breakfast around a big communal table. The subject … [Read more...]